Mistaken identity (after m. Twain)

Several years ago I arrived in New York, where I was to change trains and take a sleeper. There were crowds of people on the platform, and they were all trying to get into the long sleeper train, which was already crowded. I asked the young man in the booking office if I could have a sleeping-berth and he answered: “No”. I went off and asked another local official if I could have some poor little corner somewhere in a sleeping car, but he interrupted me angrily saying: “No, you can’t, every corner is full. Now do not bother me any more” and he turned his back and walked off. I felt so hurt that I said to my companion: “If these people knew who I was, they… .” But my companion stopped me there: “Don’t talk such nonsense,” he said, “if they knew who you were, do you think it would help you to get a vacant seat in a train which has no vacant seats in it?”

This did not improve my mood at all but then I noticed that the porter of a sleeping car was looking at me. I saw the expression of his face suddenly change. He whispered to the conductor, pointing to me and I realized I was being talked about. Then the conductor came forward, his face all politeness.

“Can I be of any service to you?” he asked. “Do you want a place in a sleeping car?”

“Yes,” I said. “I will be very grateful to you if you can give me a place, anything will do.”

“We have nothing left except the big family compartment,” the conductor continued, “with two berths and a couple of arm-chairs in it. It is entirely at your disposal. Here, Tom, take these suitcases aboard!”

Then he touched his hat and moved along. The porter made us comfortable in the compartment and then he said, with many bows and smiles:

“Is there anything you want, sir? Because you can have just anything you want.”

“Can I have some hot water?” I asked.

“Yes, sir, I’ll get it myself.”

“Good! Now this lamp is hung too high above the berth. Can I have a better lamp fixed just at the head of my bed below the luggage rack, so that I can read comfortably?”

“Yes, sir. The lamp you want is just being fixed in the next compartment. I will get it from there and fix it here. It will burn all night. Yes, sir, you can ask for anything you want, the whole railroad will be turned inside out to please you.” And he disappeared.

I smiled at my companion and said:

“Well, what do you say now? Didn’t their attitude change the moment they understood I was Mark Twain?” My companion did not answer. So I added: “Don’t you like the way you are being served? And all for the same fare.”

As I was saying this, the porter’s smiling face appeared in the door way and this speech followed:

“Oh, sir, I recognized you the minute I set my eyes on you.”

“Is that so, my boy?” I said, handing him a good tip. “Who am I?”

“Mr. McClellan, Mayor of New York,” he said and disappeared again.

Ex.25. Answer the following questions.

1) What was Mark Twain to do in New York? 2) What were people doing on the platform? 3) Who did Mark Twain speak to about getting a place in the train? 4) Why was Mark Twain hurt by the official’s answer? 5) What did Mark Twain’s companion said that didn’t improve the writer’s mood? 6) What did Mark Twain notice then? 7) What did the conductor say to Mark Twain? 8) What kind of compartment did the conductor put at Mark Twain’s disposal? 9) What did the conductor tell Tom to do with the gentlemen’s suitcases? 10) What did Mark Twain say about the conductor’s and the porter’s attitude to them? 11) Did Mark Twain’s companion like the way they were being served? 12) Was the conductor’s attitude to Mark Twain the result of his respect to the writer?

Ex.26. Go back to the text A and find English equivalents to the following Russian phrases.

1) много лет назад; 2) сесть в спальный вагон; 3) можно мне получить спальное место?; 4) не надоедайте мне больше; 5) и ушёл прочь; 6) не могу ли я чем-нибудь помочь вам?; 7) у нас ничего не осталось; 8) он устроил нас в купе; 9) вам нужно что-нибудь?; 10) не принесёте ли вы мне горячей воды?; 11) я возьму (лампу) оттуда; 12) вы можете попросить всё, что хотите; 13) а что вы теперь скажете?; 14) как только они узнали; 15) в дверях; 16) правда?

Ex.27. True or false? Correct the statements which do not correspond to the contents of the text A.

1) Several years ago Mark Twain arrived in Washington where he was to change buses. 2) At the railway station there were many people trying to get into the train. 3) Mark Twain bought the ticket in the booking office. 4) There were many vacant seats in the train. 5) When Mark Twain turned to the official at the railway station, the latter was very polite to him and said he was ready to do anything for the writer and his companion. 6) Mark Twain was very disappointed when nobody recognized him. 7) The conductor gave Mark Twain a poor little corner in a sleeper which was already overcrowded. 8) The conductor’s name was Tom. 9) There were four berths and two chairs in the compartment. 10) Mark Twain asked the porter to repair the berth. 11) The porter tried to please Mark Twain because he thought him to be Mayor of New York.

Ex.28. Complete the following sentences using words and phrases from the Vocabulary List. Try to think of as many variants as possible.

1) I consulted the railway-guide and found out that___. 2) We have so much luggage. The rack won’t really hold it. We shall have to___. 3) He always buys season tickets because___. 4) If you did not book your ticket beforehand, you would have to___. 5) I phoned the Information Bureau and found out that___. 6) Where is the cloak-room, I wonder? I want to___. 7) If you want to buy a ticket for your journey, you must___. 8) Passenger trains are very rarely late nowadays but___. 9) If you have much luggage you can___. 10) They did not want to miss the train, that’s why___. 11) The train was ready to leave, that’s why___. 12) The train starts in twenty minutes, so if you are hungry you can___. 13) We had to leave Moscow by a slow train because___.

Ex.29. Answer the following questions.

1) How many railway stations are there in Samara (Moscow)? 2) Where can you buy a ticket for your journey? 3) What are waiting rooms for? 4) Who can help you with your luggage? 5) What carriages do you prefer to travel by? (sleeping car, open-type car or day coach). Give your reasons. 6) Where can a passenger have a snack? 7) What trains have dining cars? 8) Do you prefer to book your tickets beforehand or buy them just before your departure? 9) What is the left-luggage room for? 10) Do you usually travel light or with a lot of things? 11) Where can you buy a newspaper at the railway stations? 12) Do you like seeing your friends and relatives off? 13) Do you like it when your friends and relatives come to see you off? 14) Where can a passenger get information about the time of trains arrival and departure? 15) Do you usually buy a single or return ticket? Give your reasons. 16) Do you like an upper or a lower berth? 17) Are there smoking and non-smoking carriages on our trains? 18) To whom does a passenger show his ticket before entering the carriage? 19) Do you like reading (talking, sleeping, etc.) on a train? 20) How do you like to travel: by air, by sea, by car or by rail? Explain your choice.

Ex.30. Make up sentences, saying what you have to do (or had to do) and why?

Model: to get up early → I had to get up early because I was afraid to miss the first train.

1) to stay in town all summer; 2) to go to the booking office at 7 a.m.; 3) to catch an early train; 4) to wait for a long time; 5) to pack my suitcase in a hurry; 6) to go to the railway station; 7) to see my friend off; 8) to talk about dull things; 9) to give a ring to the enquiry office; 10) to eat uneatable cereal.

Ex.31. Your friend tells you how he gets from Washington to New York. Fill in the blanks with the words from the box. Be careful with Grammar.